The Myths and Misconceptions about Marriage

Happy Sunday!  Happy Independence Day!

It's the season for weddings!  If a young man or woman you love is getting married what advice would you give them?  Would you pretend that your marriage is perfect and you never have any problems? Would you tell them the truth?  Would you say that it's the toughest relationship to navigate? Would you admit your mistakes?  I hope you would tell them that marriage is awesome, but sometimes awfull!  I hope that you would give them your well earned wisdom in hope that their marriage would succeed.  I remember a skit from the show, "In Living Color".  The married couple would beat and batter eachother, but in the end they would say in unison, "We're still together!"  It was funny, but it said a lot about how we view marriage.

 Bishop continued his series on “Relationships” today.  The focus was on marriage and Bishop titled the sermon, “The Myths and Misconceptions about Marriage”.  He used Ephesians 5:21-29 as the text. Whether you are anticipating marriage in the future, in a marriage that works or can be improved, entering a marriage with hope and faith, or leaving a marriage that just didn’t survive; we can all learn more about God’s design for marriage.  Marriage is the fundamental relationship.  God designed marriage to affect every other relationship.  

Misconceptions and Myths about Marriage

 ·         Everyone should be married.  The Apostle Paul explained that choosing marriage changes your focus toward ministry.  The husband and wife now must first seek to please each other.  1 Corinthians 7:7 - Sometimes I wish everyone were single like me—a simpler life in many ways! But celibacy is not for everyone any more than marriage is. God gives the gift of the single life to some, the gift of the married life to others.

·         Living together will give you the advantage.  So you want to test drive before you buy!  Or you think why buy the cow if I can get the milk for free! Sorry, shacking does not ensure that marriage will last.  I’m speaking from experience now! Sad and sorrowful experience.  Marriage is a God thing.  When you decide to do it God’s way the enemy does everything in his power to break the relationship.  Sure there are some relationships that started wrong and have turned out fine.  But why take the chance?

·         Marriage completes you.  If you enter the marriage broken, damaged, self-conscious, and schizophrenic you will just be a broken, damaged, self conscious, schizophrenic married person. Only Christ completes you.  It’s an inside job.  Get counseling, closure, and professional help before you marry another person who has their own bag of issues.

·         Marriage is a cure for loneliness.  Al Bundy should be the poster boy for this misconception.  If you are too young to remember the show “Married with Children”, Google it!  Al and Peg Bundy could be in the house together and it didn’t mean a thing.  Al would be positioned on the couch and never noticed Peg until she stood in front of the television.  Marriage will not cure your loneliness.   Get a life!  Find things that you enjoy!  Have activities and friends that you enjoy prior to marrying. 

·         Marriage is 50/50.  If the one you love stood at the altar and proclaimed, “ I promise to love you 50% of the time, with 50% of my heart, and 50% of my faithfulness, and 50% of my money, and 50% of my understanding, care and compassion.”  Would you still marry them?  Would you run? Relationships require more than 100% from each individual.  There will be days when you give more and there will be days when your spouse will give more.  But it will always add up to more than 50%.  Stop counting!  Galatians 6:7-8 (The Message) Don't be misled: No one makes a fool of God. What a person plants, he will harvest. The person who plants selfishness, ignoring the needs of others—ignoring God!—harvests a crop of weeds. All he'll have to show for his life is weeds! But the one who plants in response to God, letting God's Spirit do the growth work in him, harvests a crop of real life, eternal life.

·         ALL your sexual needs will be met when you marry.  Do I really need to go there?  It is humanly impossible to be everything to anyone.  

Tell someone the truth!  You will be glad you did!  Have a great week!  Love, Cynthia